Friday, January 16, 2009

A Letter Of Disassociation.

December 21, 2002

To The Governing Body of Jehovah's Witnesses,

Oh, how I loved Jehovah, still do, in fact, but how I loved His organization. How I looked forward to those Watchtowers as letters from Jehovah.

And Oh, how you broke me, beat me, destroyed me, ruined us financially, and tore my heart right down the middle.

If you are sincere, you will read the rest of this letter. I wrote to you a few years ago, when I still felt that Jehovah's Witnesses were Gods earthly organization, and I asked you scriptural questions, with respect and love, the same questions I had asked elders over and over, all of whom said they did not have time to give me spiritual help. You did not deign to reply to my heartfelt appeal to you to please, please help me to keep on believing that you were Gods Channel.

You must be aware, of the many ways in which the doctrines of Jehovah's Witnesses are unscriptural, others have written you, and from the fact that you would not reply to a very longstanding, dedicated witness appeal to you for help, I see that you do not care in the least.

Do you know that my doubts started as early as 1974? But that my mind was so controlled from being raised in the truth, that while reading the Bible in French, looking up words in the dictionary, instead of through Watchtower glasses in my native English, when I came to realize the position of Jesus Christ and his invitation to me, I got on my knees and begged forgiveness for my apostasy. And this started conflict which lasted 25 years, including 15 years of continual suicide attempts and hospitalizations caused by my doubts, which made me feel like a Judas. You must realize how terrible it is, and the absolute authority you have over the minds of others, when a person reads in the Bible and discovers its true message, that they feel that they are at fault, causing them extreme emotional upheaval and devastating guilt.

But Jesus never left me. For the two minutes while I realized Jesus position, invitation, and hope He offered, I felt joy indescribable, and loved Him. And He stayed, never leaving or forsaking me throughout all the agony of clearing my mind of the control of humans. I did speak to a Circuit Overseer about it, since I felt that I must partake of the emblems at the Memorial, but could not reconcile this with my gut feeling that I was not a member of some elite group, but an ordinary Christian, and the Circuit Overseer instructed me not to partake. I sat through every succeeding Memorial in agony, praying that I would not take the emblems by accident, since the absolute knowledge that I should take them was unmistakable.

And this is the thing I hold you responsible for, more than for ruining our lives with your constant false prophecies, for which you were not even honest enough to take responsibility, instead blaming your obedient slaves, even in some cases, such in the Awake magazine, implying that the Creator had changed His mind, more for the constantly changing present truth (a phrase which conflicts with scripture the truth of the Lord endures forever Ps.117:2; Thy word is true from the beginning, and every one of Thy righteous judgments endureth forever. Ps. 119:160); more than for the constant exhortations to do more than I was ever able to do; more than for covering up and protecting the perpetrator of a rape against me who was not even a witness, just a doctor recommended by the congregation, blaming me for it, causing a lifetime of agony; more than all these things, I blame you for trying to take Jesus Christ away from me as the Way, the Truth, and the Life, and the only way to the Father, the only mediator between God and man. Because without Jesus, there is no hope for anyone on this earth, and you claim to keep Him to yourselves, and put yourself in His place as mediator for others, a doctrine completely in harmony with scriptural descriptions of false prophets and false Christs.

I pray for you, that you will get on your knees and repent, really think of the untold agony you have caused so many people, and the ruin of so many lives, the hardship of those who believed your false prophecies and put all their energies into working for you (thinking they were working for Jehovah), think of people like me, crazed with guilt for having believed the Bible instead of you, down by the river, crying tears and sobbing great hurting sobs, taking pills so that once I got into the river I would not have the strength to get back out, wanting death because of thinking I was Judas, all because of your teachings. Being pulled out of the river miraculously when a second before there seemed to be not a person in sight, being saved miraculously 15 times from attempted suicide, all caused by you and your insistence that people believe what you say or be damned. And while you are repenting, think of the loneliness you have caused sincere ones who have had to leave, because their conscience would not allow them to preach falsehoods any more, when their own flesh and blood and dear friends called them more wicked than Satan and cut them out of their lives. Think to yourself Who do I think I am to have this much power? And what group of people in the Bible had that kind of power? Certainly not the humble Christians.

They were the ones who so suffered from the attitudes which parallel those you teach. Put yourself in the place of the people you have ruined, and cry out for forgiveness, and go sell all your belongings, and give to the poor, and come be a follower of Jesus. And while you are giving out those immense riches you have amassed, think of the ones who have gone through starvation for having followed your advice.

Jesus will forgive you. He invites you. I, a person ruined according to the world, suffering disabling health problems caused by my zeal to not only be whole-hearted in Jehovah's service but also be the wife of Proverbs 31, constantly thrown at sisters at assemblies, am now rich. I have no money, but I belong to Christ. The Bible is opening up to me, and every day, I learn a great and unsearchable thing Jer. 33:3. And that makes me rich. With the riches you tried to take away from me, and have succeeded in taking away from so many victims, among your other crimes.

So I do not ask for your sympathy. I feel sorry for you. Either you are completely mind-controlled, or you are like Satan, knowing deceivers. I pray for you, that my Abba Father will have mercy on you, and you will accept Jesus, as the only truth, the only way to God.

Its strange how prayers are answered. After the elders told me not to come back to the Kingdom Hall because it made me weep (compassion certainly not in evidence), I prayed every night on my knees for the truth, and every time I prayed, John 14:6 came into my mind, until finally, I realized, Jesus is the truth. His person, his teachings, his life, his sacrifice. And then the Bible came together and I saw, when he opened my blind eyes, the harmonious simple message it is, all about Jesus Christ from beginning to end. A message everlasting, (not present truth), so beautiful.

I have left the step I am now taking for a long time, because I could never give up hope, because I love the brotherhood, and then just because I didn't realize the need the get out from among them, and quit touching the unclean thing. I do now realize that necessity, and therefore wish to disassociate myself from the organization of Jehovah's Witnesses.

I weep no more, you brothers at the Kingdom Hall who were so cruel to me in my great need. I no longer long to be part of Jehovah's Witnesses, or to kill myself because I am not. I am a member of the family of God, His child, having had the Spirit bear witness with my spirit, that I am a child of God. I pray the same experience for you brothers.

With love for you as people who my Lord died for, who can repent as long as you have life, and with hope that you will,

Louise Plaskett


No comments: